Saturday, October 6, 2012

Day 6 - What not to say

Well this is a tough one and probably not something I would have ever put into writing. Let's be honest there have been a few choice phrases said to us over the time but these are the ones that have stuck with me for almost 4 years. Some people should just not speak...

1. 'Don't worry, you can have another baby'
(Really? You seriously don't meant that... Our daughter died. I almost died... do you really want to say that? Yes we were lucky enough to but only after almost 4 years of struggle and a wonderful amazing surrogate to delivery him for us!! No we couldn't just have another baby!)

2. 'Ah, it's probably for the best'
(Best for who? Sophie was perfect and it was the medical profession that let her and us down. She should be here but they decided she was safer inside my uterus... how wrong they all were!)

3. 'Wow, she was a real baby' (after seeing her photos)
(Umm yes she was.. flesh and blood and absolutely gorgeous! I ask the what age do people thing babies are real?)

4. Are you over it yet?? Or even better.. I'm sure you have moved on by now?
(Simply never ever going to happen. I miss Sophie even more now that I have Hamish! Every time I look at him I wonder how she would have looked at his age. How it would have felt to see her smile. Please know that I will never be over losing my daughter, not last week, not tomorrow and not next year. It was the worst thing that has ever happened to me, categorically the worst.. nothing will surpass her death.

I am sure there are others but for whatever reason my small and delicate brain has protected me and allowed me to forget them.

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